bittersweet

as many of you know, i am going back to the states on sunday for a nice long 5 week visit. i could not be more excited! i'm not gonna lie, i am always looking forward to going home even if i just got back from a trip. don't get me wrong, i really do like being here in costa rica with paris and his family and working at my job but i also really love being at home with my friends and my family.

it's hard living in another country without your own people. it's hard always feeling like that foreigner girl, especially when the language spoken isn't your native language. it's hard not being able to do some of the things you would normally do at home just because here it simply isn't safe or comfortable. and it's really hard not to think about those things a lot of the time.

oh the other hand, it is very very nice to be here with paris and to have the opportunity to live (pretty much) on our own and have our relationship grow while we are face to face instead of thousands of miles apart ... yes that part is nice.

so that is why this upcoming trip is bittersweet. because paris .. and my baby rocco ... cannot make the trip with me. in order for paris to enter the U.S.A he needs a visa. even if it is just a week long trip ... he needs a visa. and that visa process really isn't all that easy or cheap. so we are waiting until he has a little bit more experience at his job where they can write him a really great recommendation letter that will hopefully lead him to visa-dom. but until then i have to make my trips home solo (or sola .. you know if you're speaking spanish). so yes this trip is a little bittersweet because heck yes i am excited to go home! but boy oh boy am i gonna miss my two guys!